Remember the story of Narad Muni passing by the tree where the three sadhus were meditating?The first sadhu said, "Narad Muni, you are trikal darsi, you see the past, present and future.How long will it take me to become enlightened?"Narad looked inside, he said, "It's going to take you ten thousand years.""Ten thousand years! Oh, no," exclaimed the sadhu.
The second sadhu said, "How long will it take me to get enlightened?"Narad Muni looked inside and said, "It's going to take you twenty-five thousand years.""Oh, no," complained the second sadhu.
The third sadhu said, "Narad Muni, how long is it going to take me to get enlightened?"And Narad Muni looked inside, and he said, "It's going to take you fifty thousand lifetimes."And the sadhu said, "You mean I'm going to make it!"
He was enlightened at that moment.Because two of the sadhus meditating looked at the glass as half empty, and he looked at the glass as half full.
Remember the great ego performed a tremendous tapasya. And the ego said, "I want to be immortal." Brahma came and said, "That's impossible, no one is immortal, everyone that takes birth dies." And so the great ego said, "Well, my death, if it has to occur, let it occur at the hands of a woman." And Brahma said, "Why, would you want a boon like that?" And the great ego said, "Well, I'm so strong and heroic, there's not a man who can defeat me, what woman could defeat me?" And Brahma immediately said, "Tatastu. I give you the boon, we'll find one."
The great ego conquered the entire earth, made everyone on earth a servant of the ego. In fact there was no one who was doing anything without saying, "I am the doer". Then the ego marched up to Heaven, he threw all the Gods and Goddesses out of Heaven, and the Gods and Goddesses were homeless, and bereft, and dispirited and dejected. And having no place to go, they came to earth, and they took on bodies of men and women.
Well, all the men and women were servants of the ego, so the God's started acting like human beings. Yuck! And they started drawing lines on the earth, and saying, "This is mine and that's yours, etc., etc.”
Well, some of the Gods and Goddesses got together and said, "This is horrible, to be servants of the ego all the time in every activity. We've got to find a way to conquer the ego." So then they said, "Vishnu, would you please send your wife." And Lakshmi said, "Well, no, no, I don't want to go. I'm not going to fight the ego." And then they said, "Brahma, would you send Saraswati." And Saraswati said, "Wait, wait, did you ask me? I'm not going to fight him by myself. He's so strong, he got the boon that no one can defeat him, just a woman."
Well then they asked Kali, they asked Durga, they asked all the other Girls in Heaven, and nobody wanted to go. The Gods said, "This is horrible, what are we going to do? Let's go to the Devi Mandir. Everybody put forth your lights. Let all the lights unite into one light of radiant splendor like a pillar of fire. And let this pillar of fire rise and take the form of a woman."
And that is the rise of Chandi. United from the fire of the lights of all the Gods and Goddesses, she comes as a pillar of fire, and she does battle with the ego on our behalf. The ego won the boon that he's too strong for any of us; She is the only one who can defeat him.
So we have to pray to her, to please her. She is the energy of all in everything, if she chooses she gives energy to the ego and makes him puffed up with pride. And if she chooses she can withdraw the energy from the ego and give it to the Divinity within, and make us surrender the ego in the light of wisdom.
And that's what our sadhana is about. That's the purpose of our tapasya, to surrender the ego in the light of wisdom.
Question: What do you think contributed to the birth of Shree Maa, who is regarded today as a Divine Mother? Did you perform spiritual practices, austerity, tapasya, or did you pray for a spiritual child? Did you know that you would give birth to a spiritual child?
Bara Maa: Yes, I prayed, I did puja, and my Guru said that my child would make a major spiritual contribution to this world. So I knew. But I am sure every mother prays that her child will be happy and lead a productive life. The difference with Shree Maa was that she radiated light from the time she entered into the womb. And my Guru specifically said that she was a divine child. I had total faith that he would not tell me that if it wasn’t true.
Question: Did you know Shree Maa would become recognized as a Divine Mother?
Bara Maa: Yes, I understood completely that something special was to come from her.
Question: Do you believe it was God's grace that brought Shree Maa into your family?
Bara Maa: Of course. A pure soul chooses where he or she will take birth according to the karma to be fulfilled. We cannot force a soul to take birth in our home. The soul will choose. That is Grace.
Question: Did you have to make any special arrangements to care for Shree Maa as a child, that were different from the other siblings?
Bara Maa: She was my first, so everything I did was special. Every child is special. They all require something unique.
We came from a big family. Can anyone actually know who they really are, and what they have come to do? Can they know how big they are, how important they are, how important they are destined to become? Who am I, will only be known through our karma.
Shree Maa often sat with her eyes closed. Wherever she sat, a crowd gathered. Our house was always full of people.
So many people came to test her. She would sit with her eyes closed. One time a tantrik sadhu came with a bag hung from his shoulder. He ordered Shree Maa to sit beside him. She did not move from her meditation. He called to her again and again, but she did not move. Suddenly he got up and left in a hurry, afraid that he would be discovered to be a fraud.
Many other sadhus visited; even government officials. They were all amazed. Shree Maa knew the most intimate details of Sarada Devi’s life, even told stories about Ramakrishna that no one else knew, but everyone recognized to be authentic.
One Kalika Sadhika came and said she is a fraud. She tied some mustard seeds in a cloth and put it under Shree Maa’s pillow, while Shree Maa was sitting in meditation. She said that this would “cure” her from the obvious affliction from which she was suffering. When Shree Maa awoke from her meditation, everyone had left, and she immediately went into her room and threw her pillow out from the window. How did she know that something was done? How did she know what to do to remedy the matter?
One time on Amamashya we were celebrating Kali Puja. We were all complaining that Shree Maa continued fasting. She didn’t eat anything. We had prepared a big pot of rice. Nobody wanted to eat until Shree Maa ate, so we all complained again and again. Then she went into the kitchen, picked up the pot, and ate the entire contents. She ate all the rice prepared for so many people!
I always observed Akshar Tritiyam Vrat, the Vow of Worship for the third day. I worshipped Mangala Chandi, and I offered whatever I had to give. I wrote my own songs, and offered them as an appropriate gift to the Goddess.
